1…This whole referendum was little more than a tactic to keep the Conservative Party united and to stop defections of voters and Tory members to UKIP.

Yes ….so I should probably abstain.

2…Cameron won the 2015 Election on the basis he would re-negotiate the relationship between Britain and EU. The negotiations and the result were a total sham.

Yes…I should abstain.

3…But the EU is a good thing economically and politically.

Yes to the first part. I should vote to REMAIN. But a bad thing politically. I should vote to LEAVE.

4….But you are a European citizen.

Bollox. I should vote to LEAVE …and go to the European Commission, ask for a EU flag….and burn it.

5 Have you no affection or loyalty for Europe?

Absolutely none. I should vote to LEAVE.

6 But a LEAVE vote could lead to the break up of the United Kingdom.

I certainly hope so. I will persuade my friends to vote to LEAVE.

7 Isnt it important that British Labour are supporting the Tory Government?

A responsible Opposition should act in accordance with its conscience and if Labour support Cameron…so be it. But on the other hand, Tories are Tories….and screwing them is always a good choice. Either way Cameron is toast. REMAIN OR LEAVE is irrelevant….but bringing down a government before its term is tempting.

8 But you cant support Boris Johnson, Nigel Farage, Michael Gove….

No…I should vote REMAIN. And dont forget Kate Hoey.

9 and two hundred celebrities have written to the Guardian urging people to vote REMAIN….and Jess Phillips.

yes and it convinces me to vote to LEAVE.

10 but seriously the Norn Iron Independent Retailers Association  say REMAIN.

yes and seriously that convinces me to vote LEAVE.

11 but if theres a LEAVE vote….World War Three would break out.

well then I should definitely vote REMAIN.

12  And arent you looking forward to being in a political union with Turkey??

Strangely no….their Human Rights record is bad. IM voting LEAVE

13 But Turkey is a major trading partner?

then I should vote REMAIN.

14on the other hand the major trade is Migrants and Refugees.

yes ….Europe has made People Trafficking a respjectable industry. VOte LEAVE, I think.

15…but Greece was bailed out by Europe.

actually Europe made German Inmperilaism respectable for the first time since 1945. I will vote LEAVE.

16 Dont mention Hitler …

OK….Angela Merkel.

17 what is best for Ireland?

ah now youre talking…I actually care about Ireland. I should vote REMAIN.

18 ah now you have joined the Establishment?

If I thought that Id vote to LEAVE. The Establishment always win. Look at the Scotland Referendum. THe Establishment will lie thru their teeth.

19 a REMAINvote will settle the issue?

probably not. The anti EU people will strike again. And the REMAIN side are as bad.

20 Wont someone think of the children?

actually I do…MY children. MY grandchildren. My vote is not about what is best for me…because I dont give a tinkers curse either way. I am inclined to vote IN SPITE OF rather than BECAUSE of the stances taken up by public people…all in search of an OBE.